This Is An Emergency: I Need TP!
March 16, 2020 12:01PM EDT

SINGAPORE – FEBRUARY 9: A woman takes a packet of toilet paper off a half-empty shelf at a supermarket after news of the raised outbreak of coronavirus became public people have been panicked to stock up on necessities as on February 9, 2020 in Singapore. The total number of people infected in Singapore has grown to 40. (Photo by Ore Huiying/Getty Images)
Running out of toilet paper? It’s a tough situation, but that doesn’t mean you should call 911 about it.
Apparently the people of Oregon weren’t heeding that advice, because the Newport Police Department had to post a warning on their Facebook page, writing “Do not call 9-1-1 just because you ran out of toilet paper. You will survive without our assistance.”
They even offered helpful advice on alternatives, such as “Grocery receipts, newspaper, cloth rags”, or even the good old Sears catalog. They point out that Mayans and Colonial Americans would use corn cobs, while old sailors used rope soaked in salt water.
Did you manage to stock up on toilet paper before the hoarding began? Do you have a backup plan when the last roll runs out?
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