Just Sitting On Your Couch Naked With a Fireplace Poker

This did NOT happen in Florida, but it sounds like it did…
An Illinois man was arrested and charged with, well, anything a man who broke into someone’s house to drink beer and steal a fire poker might be charged with. The Dixon man broke into a couple’s home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, got naked, grabbed himself three beers and sat down beside one of the homeowners sleeping on the couch while pointing a fire poker at him.
The sleeping man woke up and ran upstairs to tell another person sleeping in the house what was happening while nude dude continued drinking their beer. When they both went to confront the man he was completely naked and trying to hide.