A Real Porky Predicament

A highway in downtown Kansas City was closed for more than four hours on Thursday after a tractor trailer spilled pig intestines all over the highway.

Motorists say the smell was awful, with one passerby tweeting “It stinks so bad and I almost threw up in my car”. Unlike the armored truck that spilled cash on the highway in Atlanta, I don’t think any driver got out to scoop up pig guts…

Crews had to use powdered soap and a snowplow to clear the animal guts off the road, while MoDOT officials urged motorists to “Find an alternate snout. Sorry, alternate route” as it cleaned up the “pork predicament”.

By the way, that reminds me… my new band pork predicament is playing tonight at The Senate… entry is free, but we’re asking for bacon donations, and we’ll be playing our hit single ‘Alternate Snout.’